I entered the Masquerade mainly because my Elizabethan gown is too big to be practical as a hall costume--the skirt has an 11' circumference. The main drawback to this was that the Masquerade ate up most of Sunday night for me. Contestants had to arrive at the Civic Center at 6:30, and what with the judging, we didn't get out of there til after 11pm. (It would have gone a bit faster if the emcees hadn't been so convinced they were funny--or if they'd actually been funny.)

In order to arrive on time, I went back to my room at 5 to start doing my hair; Aaron arrived soon thereafter to help me into the costume: chemise, kirtle, hoops, bumroll, partlet, bodice, jewelry, ruff, and attifet. He's gotten to be quite the expert lady-in-waiting. Then we very carefully traversed the hotels to find our way to the contestants' shuttle behind the Marriott. I barely fit in the shuttle; I had to pull up my hoops to let other people pass me in the aisle.

If I ever do the DragonCon Masquerade again, I will know better than to obey the 6:30 arrival rule; we got there on time and then had to stand around in the hallways and stairwells for close to an hour. Eventually, we were herded into small groups and given numbers. Then we got to stand in a loading dock for another 45 minutes while each contestant had pictures taken. It's not so much all the hurry-up-and-wait I objected to--I'd pretty much expected that--but it struck me as really bad planning to have all these people hanging around with nowhere to sit for an hour and a half. I applied my makeup, and then we passed some of the time gossiping and taking pictures of the other contestants. The atmosphere backstage was surprisingly relaxed; everyone complimented each other's outfits, and there was no sense of contention or rivalry.

At last, our groups were herded backstage, where, finally, there were chairs to sit on. We were behind the big screen over the main stage, so we could watch the other entries. The clever folks at DragonConTV had designed a Matrix-style intro, with green letters dropping across a black background, and a Doctor Who style logo, since the principal emcee was none other than Peter Davison, the 5th Doctor. Since we were watching the back of the screen, any words projected showed up backwards; it's amazing how much backwards letters in backwards English words look like Polish...and also amusing how long it took me to stop trying to reverse letters and words after the Masquerade was over. Everything written forward looked somehow...strange.

The children's entries went first. The Best in Show winner was a toddler dressed as an Ewok; the presentation speech written by his mom was all about how vicious these indigenous creatures of Endor were, and how they'd tear a stormtrooper limb from limb; the baby came out clutching a piece of white leg armor as evidence. Awww....how sweet!

My own presentation went very well. For those who missed this, I decided that the Lizgown was not quite the right costume for a rowdy, media-oriented con like DragonCon, so I spruced it up a bit. Aaron mixed me a soundtrack CD of the theme to "Superman" played on harpsichord and flute, and Brian recorded the following voice over for me:

"Faster than a speeding arrow…More powerful than a battering ram…Able to leap the Tower of London in a fully-laced corset. Look! Up on the stage! It's Ophelia! It's Desdemona! No, it's the Elizerator! Yes, the Elizerator: strange visitor from another era who came to the con with powers and abilities far beyond those of modern men. The Elizerator, who can change the course of history; cut hoop boning with her bare hands; and who--disguised as Joy Lanterman, mild-mannered technical writer for a software developer-- fights a never-ending battle for Beauty, Corsetry, and the Elizabethan Way."

I got a great audience reaction, huge laugh and round of applause.

The Headless Horseman here was part of a group presentation of Sleepy Hollow costumes. Their costumes were great, but their presentation was a muddle; the audience booed them, and the stormtroopers were putting on their helmets to come push them offstage, but luckily it ended of its own accord before such drastic measures were necessary.

The green lady in front of him entered as a Dragon Lady; no, the horse is not biting her in the butt.

More highlights:

The Best in Show prize went to a group dressed as undead who danced and lip synched the "Cell Block Tango" from "Chicago," right down to replicating the movie's choreography. It was stunning.

The Best in Show - Master prize went to another group, dressed as the Electric Mayhem band from the "Muppet Show," with huge foam Muppet heads and cardboard instruments. (For some reason there was no Best in Show for the Journeyman or Novice categories.)

Another Master category entry featured four stunning archangel costumes, and the four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Their presentation started quite solemnly, then suddenly turned into a WWF wrestling match.

Best Comedy went to Luke Ski and a companion who dressed as Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, dueling to a sound track of a Harry Potter rap written by Luke.

Just as my group was prodded toward the wings in preparation for our own entries, a pair dressed as Frankenstein and the Monster did a "Puttin' on the Ritz" tapdance number, à la "Young Frankenstein." Alas, I missed most of this; as it was, I almost lost track of my group, watching the screen--Aaron whispered, "Joyce, aren't you supposed to follow them?" and I started and dashed off (as well as one can dash in 12 pounds of fabric and metal).

Best Construction went to a fantastically beaded, bright yellow costume called "Queen of the Summer." She had a farthingale!

The Judges' Favorite prize was awarded to a goth-girl who did a reverse strip tease; arriving at the con, she changed onstage out of her revealing goth gear into a full-body-coverage Star Trek costume.

Best Alien went to a group with a truly astonishing Alien (as in Sigourney Weaver) costume, and two other tentacly things I wasn't familiar with.

An entry called "Return of the King" was a young guy in a green Elvis outfit carrying a bow and quiver of arrows. His gold lame-lined green cape had Elven runes on the back--I'd love to know what they said. (This entry reminded me of Terry Pratchett's Soul Music, and in fact I half-expected it to be called "Bud y Celyn--Are You Sure You're Not Elvish?")

There were a lot of Tolkien elves, a fantastic leather-armored lion man, a trio dressed as Final Fantasy characters, and a couple dressed as Heralds of Valdemar--wearing white cotehardies they'd designed for their wedding. Let's hear it for fandom, where you get to re-use your wedding dress!

Last revision: 9/8/2004